Gratitude | Life Lately
September, 1994. Will McIntyre/The LIFE Images Collection via Getty Images.
The pads and soles of my feet ache, there are mosquito bites around my ankles, I’ve been working on my oral defense for two days and yet I’ve completed less than a quarter of it. My legs are unshaven (how am I supposed to find the energy to do all of that bending and twisting???) and the house, despite seemingly endless amounts of cleaning, remains as cluttered as ever. Actually, a few hours ago, I watched a tuft of the dog’s fur roll by like tumbleweed and immediately had a flashback to when I vacuumed for two hours…yesterday. When I finally did summon the strength to turn the Rumba on, after 20 minutes, it rolled off and died somewhere and I haven’t been able to find it since.
It sounds like the worst time, but it’s actually been beautiful. Gratitude IS the attitude! I’ve been so in love with my life and I look around and feel flooded with appreciation. The fact that Jeremiah is the love of my life and my husband is astounding in and of itself. We’re growing together and encouraging and loving one another in ways that are beyond language. We live in a beautiful home with a little flower garden in the backyard that makes me smile every time I see it. Jeremiah got a statue of the Virgin Mother and placed it amongst the Calla lilies and when I go out there in the evenings, I say a Hail Mary as I water each flower and it’s repetitive and deep and healing.
Thursday (5/20) was the last day of school* for the kids and we had a day of celebration. Ms. Edwards and I were the game room teachers and we came up with the idea of setting up stations for each type of game. In my room, we had giant Kerplunk!, Uno, Jenga, art supplies, table air hockey, and Tik Tok videos streaming endlessly on the big screen. It was a lot of fun and I laughed all day. We ended with pizza and homemade ice cream, which involved a LOT of Ziplock-shaking and spilled milk. (Also, I hurt my wrist helping kids to shake freezer bags full of liquid ingredients and ice. When I got home, I had to take two Tylenol extra-strengths because it was so sore, hahaha.) I ate 3 Warheads at once to impress the kids and stopped feeling my tongue about 10 seconds in. Then, just like that, they were gone! I’m going to really miss then and also I’m really excited to get some much-needed rest. Those kids are my entire heart and also, this heart needs a nap.
Speaking of rest, I’ll be done with graduate school in a few days. I give my oral presentation (Master’s defense) on the 25th and then it’s over. I’ll officially graduate in June and walk across the stage in August. It’s bizarre to think about how much of my life has happened within this program, you know? I made friends, made mistakes, grew as an educator, and ultimately, became a better person. It’ll be weird not to see my cohort every other Wednesday or to gripe with my girls over Saturday class. But above all else, I’m feeling really proud of myself. I don’t really take much time to pause and relish in an accomplishment so I want to spend this summer to wholeheartedly acknowledge the hard work that I did. Two years of papers, deliberate practice (teaching scrimmages), differentiating, readjusting, and being reminded of why teaching is such a very special profession. At some point, I really need to push myself to document the past two years, but it’s probably not going to be today, haha.
All that is to say that I’m so ready for summer and time with my husband and resting and snuggling with Benson and Kahlo and drinking margaritas outside and visiting Mexico and Miami and just leaning into a time of rest. The photo of Toni Morrison dancing basically sums up my energy and excitement — I can finally, finally see the light at the end of the tunnel and I’m so ready. How about you?
*ehh, sort of. They have at-home packets to complete for the week of 5/24, but let’s be honest…most won’t do it and summer break started as soon as the school day was over on Thursday.
